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‘Ten Dreams for Ten Years’

‘Ten Dreams for Ten Years’

 

As my little baby has now turned 3, here are ten things I dream for her doing or becoming over the next ten years.

 

These aren’t goals for academic results or lofty aspirations for sporting prowess, but dreams of ways that we can add colour and happiness to her development. I know that this list might appear delusive, but I have daily plans for my daughters, so I don’t see why I shouldn’t be wistful about the next ten years.

 

  1. To play by running around simply and barefoot in the yard with her little sister by her side in a world of their own creation (a yard which we do not possess as yet, but plan to, within ten years anyway).

 

  1.  To appreciate others. To show thanks or show gratefulness for what others do for her.

 

  1. To travel (as a family). Within Australia, outside Australia….be exposed to landscape, to cultures to people. To learn how to initiate conversations with strangers – through using us as guides, and with us always supporting her efforts. To clarify, I mean other little girls at camping grounds or children she is sitting next to on a plane. I obviously do not  mean to talk to  ‘strangers’ as in random people on the street by herself.

 

  1. To have at least three best friends. To never limit herself to one friend or one group. I hope that she would try and be friendly with people across a few different cliques, rather than sticking within her familiar group. (Mia Freedman over at Mama Miawrote a fabulous blog post about how many best friends your children should have, but I can’t seem to find the entry. I vaguely remember her talking about five…).

I know that this could be difficult and awkward for a young girl (or anyone), but through travel and other forms of exposure (see list), this experience can be made easier (I had pen pals for years after some family holidays…I wonder if children these days instantly become facebook friends after meeting on holidays…or? I’d be interested to hear input from those who know).

 

  1. Play a team sport. Through my own experience of team sports or in after school clubs I found myself  mixing with people who you wouldn’t normally form friendships with. This can definitely boost your confidence and friendship networks, and I can only assume make yourself less likely to bullying attacks (please correct me or comment on this if my assumptions are wrong).

 

  1. To have tried a musical instrument.

This may sound slightly ‘Tiger Mom’ -ish, but I think everyone should be introduced to music as early as possible.  I am sure my Mother is laughing at this point, as my parents ‘encouraged’ me to play piano for about ten years, and I fought against it every step of the way. I hated practicing. I hated the teachers and I was extremely nervous at playing in exams or concerts (probably because of the lack of practice). The years of piano lessons certainly did not grant me with any musical skill, nor did it help my Maths skills  (working off the theory of left brain/right brain) – neither weakness helping the other really.

What it did show me was the effort that goes into mastering skills in music (and other Arts) and I became a devoted appreciator of musical talent and I enjoy listening to all forms of music including classical, opera, jazz and contemporary pop.

I have a close friend who is a brilliant viola player and I love to attend her Orchestra’s performances (see TMO – an amazing Sydney group) and can truly appreciate the skill and effort that have gone into playing such emotional and intriguing compositions.

 

  1. To encourage her love of books by modeling this passion at home. A place where the television is often turned off (and other electronics) as we enjoy a quiet afternoon/evening reading. My girls and I often already lay in bed together reading – me reading my novels, Matilda ‘reading’ her magazines through the pictures or by reciting her adored picture books aloud (such as the beloved classic ‘Possum Magic’ by Mem Fox) and bubba chewing on board books.

 

  1. To encourage her cheeky humour which already gathers a following at parties and local activities. She is a natural show-off (as are most toddlers), and I only hope that this self-confidence blossoms into her teen years, not fades.

 

  1. To hold her sister in high esteem as one of her closest and dearest friends and to build on that unshakeable sister bond every day as they grow older.

 

  1. To know that her Mother is always and forever her biggest fan and proudest supporter and will love her every moment no matter what (even during her foolish toddler tantrums I often find myself secretly smiling inside at how gorgeous she is).

As we approach Mother’s Day this weekend, I don’t need presents or gifts to thank me – my gift would be if my little girl (and girls) achieved all this and more.

Wish Making

To finish with a fabulous sentiment from Jodi Picoult (to apply to my girls) –

“What I really want to tell him is to pick up that baby of his and hold her tight, to set the moon on the edge of her crib and to hang her name up in the stars.”
― Jodi PicoultMy Sister’s Keeper

 

Lesson Six – Oh, the places you’ll go……

Lesson Six – Oh, the places you’ll go……

Lesson Nine

Once your formative school years are behind you, the world is waiting for you to dance upon.

My next lesson is about dreaming, and in the understanding that once you start to unravel the true tenor of one dream you may find yourself starting all over again, or outside your self-designed dreamscape.

I had very clear goals for when I left school. I had saved and booked into an exclusive private college where I was going to study Journalism. A few weeks into my course I found that the structure was very restricted and the timetable and homework were reflective of school practice, and I wanted out.

In danger of losing a lot of money, a second option was presented by the college which was to study their Book Editing and Publishing Course. Although the course was fairly mundane and I made no friends (and had to sit there each week quietly alone at a desk by myself feeling forlorn), I did make some use of my time there. I had finally started to immerse myself in the world of my true passion – Literature.

Curiously, it was the part time job that I got at a local bookshop – solely because of my recent Diploma course, that led me to study English Literature at University. I worked alongside a hip young group of undergraduates from the local university who were all passionately engaged in University life.

I quickly learnt that my unexpected withdrawal from college had drifted me towards my true dream thanks to the people I encountered (the experience of working with great people was tempered by being managed by a cantankerous boss, but that was all a part of that time). I had been too scared and too limited in my ambitions as I had thought Literary study too indulgent and not serious enough. I hadn’t realised that you could go to University to study areas that interested you, and to worry about connecting them to career pathways later. I had always been a worrier, and I finally started to conceive of the big dream as I went along.

When I was at Auckland University, my two close friends were a 30 something single mother who partnered cynicism with very dry humour in a Julia Morris sort of way, and a cyclopean Samoan ex-bouncer who loved playing ‘War of Warcraft’. I was drawn to them by their passion and enthusiasm for History and their ability to converse and fervently debate historical issues without self doubt or fear of being in the wrong. I would watch incredulously (because I was still a shy 20 year old) and think – but shouldn’t we be doing something else useful today…other then sit here all day discussing the true beginnings of the Civil Rights Movement..or who the greatest thinkers were in History? For the first time in my life I encountered passionate people pursuing their interests in a professional way. I was inspired to further my love of English Literature and no longer saw it as something frivolous or indulgent.

I changed universities three times over my three degrees and each time I met people who challenged my thinking and my understanding of the world and pushed me closer to dreams I wasn’t aware I was chasing. I am forever grateful to those friendships as they left indelible impressions upon me. Every experience changes you and contributes to the way you build your life and dreams.

I started my last degree, a postgraduate Bachelor of Teaching as a single mid twenty year old, and ended up having to delay my courses and meet half a dozen new cohorts as child rearing took over. I finished my last teaching Prac 6 months pregnant with my second, and studying History (Ancient Roman History, a topic I’d never previously looked at) with the most difficulty I’ve ever had. I remember staying up late, pregnant, emotional, tired, and doing my best to get all the Caesars in the right order as i was teaching a Year 12 class. Fortunately, I had the most wonderful supervising teacher, who really helped my confidence and inspired me to learn more about Ancient Rome. I thank him for my current obsession with that time period.

My discussion on some of my own post school learning experiences, and the ways that they’ve contributed to my current state of happiness ends here for now, with a reminder to my girls, and other readers to see the world with shiny eyes and when ‘things start to happen, don’t worry. Don’t stew. Just go right along. You’ll start happening too.’

– from Dr Seuss ‘Oh, the Places You’ll Go!’

 

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by Elissa in Lessons Tags: ambitions, career, debate, dr seuss quote, dream, dreaming, friendship, goals, happiness, i worry, passion, school, study, thinking, University, worry